nature

How I Look at the Stars

I’ve been holding onto this feeling
Of hot tears damned behind dry eyes
For days now, and the pressure builds.
There’s this rattling in my chest
When I inhale sharply, anxiety
Spreading out from my lungs to my heart.
I hold no expectation of healing –
This I’ll feel and fight and accept for life,
For the tears will return once the dam breaks
And the chest will hold my fears
Until the final hollow breath –
But I can hope for peace,
I believe I deserve peace
With who I am and how I feel pain.
With how I feel joy.
With how I look at the stars at night
And wonder how my light would shine
If we could all be seen
As beacons of our essence.

What We Were Made For

Here’s the truth –
We are all alone in this world
And we as humans
Strive to create connection through community
With others who are equally alone
With others who feel as deeply
The sorrow of their intimate loneliness
With others enmeshed in the conversations
Which repeat, every day, in the hollow spaces
Between the head and the heart
With others who reach for something greater,
Some higher expression of being
Which is non-manifest in the conventionality
Of our fabricated expressions of existence.
For we were made to roam
Made to suffer in the pouring rain
Made to seek shade in the heat of the day
And to seek heat around the fire at night
We were made to love deeply the rich soil
Made to sleep beneath the trees
Made to stand on the cliff in high winds
Made to be curious about the buffalo
Made to die trying in this life
To try and form a connection with the natural world
So that we can form a connection with ourselves
So that we can form a connection with others
And embrace the voice inside our heads
Telling us we are unworthy of such love in our lives.

Flower Among Flowers

Spring has come to the valley of soul
And I can feel my heart opening –
Like a flower approaching full bloom
As the snow melt feeds into the soil
And the sun hits the back of the bud –
I rise into the shape of myself
As myself, for myself, for this self
I choose to stand tall, upright and proud,
A flower among flowers, and yet
An unique soul rooted in this life.

In the Desert Silence

In the silence I sit
With my back to a rock
And the sun on my face.


I sit on a mesa
Overlooking the desert
After the storm has passed.


In the silence I can hear
The sound of sage rising
Stems filled with water and life.


I can hear a new wind
Blowing across my mesa
The warm air singing ‘Welcome.’


In the silence birds are louder
I can count the birds
By the beating of their wings.


The silence has a sound too –
Of angels ringing bells,
Of a lover’s promise.


Atop my mesa I sit
And listen to the silence
Down in the valley below.

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